Birthday Blues


Today is my 25th birthday. For some reason, I am always sad on my birthday. I’ve asked some close friends and family if they feel that way too, and to my surprise (and relief honestly), I know I’m not the only one!

It is and has always been absolutely ridiculous for me to be sad. I have a family who always makes sure that I feel special on my birthday. My mom would always cook a big yummy breakfast for me and planed to do whatever I wanted to do for this day. I get gifts. We cook or go out to eat to celebrate. I know I am so blessed to have a family who does this for me every year.

Yet, despite all of these sweet, caring things I always seem to feel a little let down.

It’s like I have such high expectations and the smallest thing can let me down. I notice when close friends or family don’t send me a happy birthday message. I notice when not as many people post of my Facebook timeline or Instagram. Or when I don’t have a birthday cake to blow out candles on (This has only happened once, and when my mom figured out I was upset, she got me a cake the next day. Haha).

And wow, saying those things out loud, they sound even more ridiculous than they do in my head! But I know I’m not the only one. I think we all get let down on birthdays sometimes.

I think most of this stems from comparison to others. You see a photo of a huge surprise birthday party on Facebook, or you see 20 people post on Instagram for that one friend’s birthday.

It’s so hard to rationalize in my head that I am just seeing a snapshot into their actual life. That their popularity doesn’t equal their happiness, and it doesn’t equal the absence of mine either! That missed text from a close friend, doesn’t mean that they don’t care about me or love me, it just means life happens!

The year, however, I am not sad because of those things. The older I’ve gotten, the more I know that who writes on my Facebook wall or who posts a photo on Instagram, will not make or break my birthday. I don’t really get upset if I miss a text from a friend or family member, because I know that I have been on the other end. I know that my birthday is just another day for most people, and I am blessed to have so many people who go out of their way to make sure my day is special.

This realization, however, has brought me back to Christmas. Christmas is the most important birthday there ever was. It is supposed to be a celebration of Christ’s birthday. Yet, we have turned it into this crazy, hectic holiday. I know that I hardly take a moment each year to wish my savior a happy birthday. It gets trumped with cooking, wrapping presents, traveling, shopping, spending time with family and friends, and so much more.

I wonder how I make Him feel on his special day…

Just this morning, I was contemplating going to church because “it’s MY birthday.”

Because everyone will tell you:

“It’s “YOUR” day! Enjoy YOUR day. Do whatever YOU want. "

But the truth is:

My birthday and everyday is not about me. Christmas and everyday is about Him.

I know that the sooner I realize that it’s not about me and it’s never been about me, the more “happy” birthday’s, and the more happy days I will have.

“Happy are the people whose strength is in You.”

Psalm 84:5

“Happy is the person who trusts in You.”

Psalm 84:12

I know this time of year is always crazy. I know that everyone has a million things to do. I know that it’s so easy to let Christmas pass by without taking the time to acknowledge what it is truly about.

I hope this Christmas that we all take the time to read to Christmas story, to thank Jesus for dying for our sins, and to thank God for sending his only son to save us.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

John 3:16

Hope you have a Merry Christmas!!

Thank you for reading!!

Shelby Leigh Kizer

#Love #GodisGood #MerryChristmas #Birthday #Happy

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Mississippi Watercolor Artist 

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